Why procrastination?


Procrastination frustrates so many people when they know they can achieve more or just get those jobs done but something always holds them back. It may be those  routine or even improvement chores around the house; it may be a work issue or perhaps helping your kids overcome their procrastination without making the problem worse with endless nagging.

It’s really a confidence thing caused by lifetime programming by parents, teachers, coaches and other kids giving you doubts about your ability to achieve the result you want, so it becomes safer to put it off than to risk failing. This is especially the case when you want to move beyond family expectations.

Your unconscious mind’s job is always to keep you safe. The problem is that your mind doesn’t realise that failing is not always the safest strategy.

I don’t need to tell you that you can become overwhelmed with all the things that you keep putting off and by the expectations of those around them. The list goes over and over in your head at night instead of letting you have a good sleep.

So much seems to be asked for at once that your mind can’t file it all leading to stress, anxiety, poor sleep and illness if it goes on.

A great strategy is to make lists and cross them out. Crossing them out with a big tick and a thick line through a completed job gives a real sense of satisfaction… more so that just rubbing them off a white board. You can see what you HAVE done and congratulate yourself.

If this isn’t enough to get you past procrastination, a great investment is simply to see me for help to clear out the trash that is stopping your unconscious mind helping you to achieve your goals.

What is your why


It is a really great exercise to stop and ask yourself why. What is your motivation in the various areas of your life and what do you really care about? Your purpose is what keeps your passion and joy alive.

Sometimes life gets too much, the world seems to be falling apart around us, and we are not sure what to hold onto anymore. It might be your relationships, your physical environment, your finances, your work. At other times, you may not be clear what has happened but you feel exposed and vulnerable.

When “stuff” happens you have an opportunity to rediscover our your sense of identity, safety, and well-being or your core, and your why which is the only truly safe place to call home.

The core of your being is not affected by circumstance or subject to the changes that happen. Who you really are is steady and consistent. as the sun. Sure, there are times when your core seems to be hard to find but it is always there, unchanging and strong.

Fifteen or so years ago I went through a very difficult time finishing many years with a manipulative and abusive husband who dissipated most of my finances. Shortly after I discovered that I had breast cancer and my world definitely felt as though it was falling apart.

That was a very good time to reassess my WHY and my WHO I am.

I went back to my roots as a neurophysiologist and took the risk of spending even more scarce money on a series of additional training programs and diplomas as I went on a journey to heal myself and rediscover my core person.

Hypnotherapy and especially The Richards Trauma Process (TRTP) were the tools I used to heal myself and I now run my hypnotherapy practice because I know very personally how life changing it is and I want to share this with others.

This is my WHY.

Never waste your life drifting without knowing your why or just living someone else’s design for you. You will be a much better friend, lover, partner and self when you choose to find your why.

Holding on is what hurts


How heavy is a glass of water?

The weight of the glass doesn’t change, but the longer you hold it, the heavier it feels.

Stress, trauma, anxieties and worries in life are like that glass of water.

In fact the weight does not matter… holding on is what hurts. If you hold it for a minute, it’s not a problem. If you hold it for an hour, your arm will ache. After a day a day, your arm will feel numb and paralysed.

The weight of the glass doesn’t change, but the longer you hold it, the heavier it feels. Holding on is what hurts.

Stress, trauma, anxieties  worries in life are like that glass of water. You can carry difficulties and stresses for a while and nothing happens. When it goes on longer without a break, holding on is what hurts. And if you continue without a break, you will feel paralysed – incapable of doing anything.

If you allow yourself to remain in a continually stressful situation without regular breaks, your body becomes ill as it turns on itself instead of what or whoever is causing your problem. This is what causes Autoimmune Disease, overweight as you insulate yourself, and even cancer.

Remember to put the “glass” down. Prolonged stress causes PTSD (post traumatic stress disorder) just as effectively as major trauma does.

Make sure you find something that is relaxing for you and if you have gone beyond just having a break, make a time to come and see me. Self-medication with alcohol or smoking only increases your problems.

Are your work habits damaging?


One of the areas I specialise in is business stress and I often see areas where bad work habits increase your stress. Here are seven of the most common ones and how to fix them.

When you get rid of the bad habits you discover much more time. Then you can work on the various mindset things that impose limits on your self belief.

  1. Multitasking is actually counterproductive. If you think you’ll do more in less time just by completing two or three tasks at once, you’re simply wrong.

Humans have a very limited attention span. After a period of hard work, you might find some of your tasks unfinished and forgotten. Learn to prioritize them and do one thing at a time. When you focus on the task you are doing at any given moment it helps you stay productive for a long time.

  1. Checking your email every minute and allowing the notifications to come onto the screen as they come in is very distracting. One task at a time increases your productivity then allot times to check the emails or as you finish each task
  2. Having a messy desk impedes your ability to properly concentrate: and becomes very distracting. A clean and ordered desk is something that will help you focus on the job that needs to be done.
  3. Failing to eat healthy lunches or snacks causes your concentration and focus to suffer and eating junk food gives you high volumes of salt and simple carbs and you may find yourself feeling like a zombie for the rest of the day. Plus having a bit of mental space away from your work-tasks will provide you with lots more energy and inspiration.
  4. You avoid exercise because it eats into your work time. In fact you need the exercise in your life for mental and physical health. It may seem counter-intuitive when you feel like you don’t have any free time, nor energy left in you at the end of the workday But you actually get more energy to last through a busy day when you are physically fit.
  5. You constantly check your phone. Your phone is there for you, not the other way round. It is a very ill-mannered tool that simply butts into your life. Organise to take messages and answer those messages when it fits in with what you are doing.
  6. You use social media as a break. Checking your news feed can make you feel yourself more tired than before. And it simply eats your time! Use your break to rest your eyes and stretch your legs instead.

In order to stay focused, healthy and productive you need to learn how to shut out the frenzy of your professional life and embrace good habits that will make your time at work all the more enjoyable.

If you are stressed at work, contact me to see if I can help you.

It’s about how you recover


We all know that stuff happens but what matters is how you recover… or what happens next.  That is about your response, your decisions your choices.

The thing is that you can choose to control what happens next and how you respond and manage your future. You can choose to step up and make changes to your thoughts, your self-talk, your habits, your environment and even the people around you if they are not helpful.

The first step to solving any problem is to listen to what you say to yourself and pick up the patterns of limitation, and so often self abuse that you regularly repeat…

Things like “oh you are stupid” when you make a mistake, “I want to but I know I am not good enough”, “people always pick on me” etc, etc, etc!

Listen to what you think and reflect backwards to understand what has happened and also the patterns that have been controlling your unconscious beliefs. This gives you an insight into what your main blocks are and why your unconscious mind thinks that choosing what happens next is unsafe.

I remember reading a quotation from Steve Waugh, the Cricketer, along the lines of “the measure of a man is how he picks himself up after he has failed.”

Sometimes picking yourself up can be difficult on your own but you reach out for help for help and this is what I do.

My skill is to help you to clear out faulty habits, dud programs in your head and memories that hold you back so that you can pick yourself up and live your life the way that you really want to.

Give me a ring to ask for help or just book in by clicking on the black box on the left and choosing a time and date.

Coping with anxiety


The best approach to coping with anxiety is  to get rid of the root cause of the problem and the special hypnotic process that I use, called TRTP is the answer. In 3-4 sessions you are able to deal with the cause of your problem, without going back over what happened consciously.

This is very safe, rapid and totally different from the Cognitive therapy that is most commonly used.The second approach is on-going for those of you who have who have either cleared up your anxiety using TRTP or for the many of you who suffer from milder anxiety.

The thing is to stop the habitual abusive self-hypnosis that so often rewinds up anxiety even after the root cause has been removed.

This habitual abusive self-hypnosis applies to so many areas of our unconscious beliefs and self-confidence is another classic area of self-abuse.

We all need to be aware of our self-talk. This winds up anxiety, it convinces people they are inadequate, that they are always late, or are not worth being loved. It is really important to listen to our own inner talk as well as helping our clients to do this.

Make the law of attraction work for you


This is an article I wrote when I selected as one of 50 personal development experts

Unblocking your powers of attraction. So many of us keep getting in our own way and preventing the Law of attraction from working.

All the events and things that people have said to you from your earliest childhood and even when your mother was pregnant build up like the layers of an onion around who you really are making it almost impossible for your real authentic self to allow the Law of Attraction to work.

Your unconscious mind absorbs all these layers of input and it tries to keep you safe from danger, from criticism, from abuse, from failure. But all these layers of protection are what actually block you from achieving what you want to do and from allow the Law of Attraction to really work.

The first step to solving this problem is reflected backward to understand the patterns that have been controlling your unconscious beliefs and why taking the next step is seen as unsafe by your mind.

There is always a pattern and when you sort it you just need to jolt through it with a pattern interrupt to cut through those layers
Of course, if some of the stresses and blocks were significant you may need help to get rid of them so that your entire body knows that you are now safe, the past is over and you were empowered to make that change. This must happen first. This is what I do in my hypnotherapy practice and it is astonishingly effective.

To read all 50 articles please click here: Law of attraction roundup

Put yourself first… always


Yes you have heard this advice before but please… put yourself first…always. I ignored this advice a few weeks ago, and my own strict rules to fit in with two clients who came together and were very keen to come immediately one after the other. My rule is to have a minimum of 30 minutes between clients so that I have a drink, a comfort stop and just a break between clients.

On this occasion I needed a toilet break and ended up hanging on until I ended up in severe pain. In fact I developed a hernia by hanging on too long, had major abdominal surgery, then 10 days later I was in agony because part of my bowel was damaged, torn and leaked into my abdominal cavity. More very major surgery and I have been very week since.

The moral of the story is to put yourself first… always.

Yes I am going to be ok and am slowly booking new clients.

Why things keep going wrong


So many of us find that things keep going wrong and they are often the same or similar things. The thing is that you are actually causing the problem by unconsciously getting in your own way but it is not your fault.

All the events and things that people have said to you from your earliest childhood and even when your mother was pregnant build up like the layers of an onion around who you really are, making it almost impossible for that real you inside to do what you really want.

Your unconscious mind has absorbed all those layers of input and it tries to keep you safe from danger, from criticism, from abuse, from failure. But all these layers of protection are what actually block you from achieving what you want.

The first step to solving this problem is to listen to what you say to yourself and pick up the patterns of limitation, and so often self abuse that you regularly repeat…

Things like “oh you are stupid” when you make a mistake, “I want to but I know I am not good enough”, “people always pick on me” etc etc etc!

The thing is to listen to what you think and reflect backwards to understand the patterns that have been controlling your unconscious beliefs. This gives you an insight into what your main blocks are and why your unconscious mind thinks that taking the next step is unsafe.

There is always a pattern and when you sort it you need to find a pattern-interrupt to cut through those layers. This I can do for you.

Of course if some of the stresses and blocks were significant you may need help to get rid of them so that your entire body knows that you are now safe, the past is over and you were empowered to make that change. This must happen first.

This is what I do in my hypnotherapy practice and it is astonishingly effective. It changes your life.

Why you self sabotage


You self sabotage because your unconscious is 90% of your mind. It’s the one in control. The voice in your head is your conscious mind – it’s not in control.

When you consciously want to do something… it might be change habits, overcome fears, sort of business stress, lose weight or many more changes…if your unconscious doesn’t agree with that idea, well guess what? Your unconscious will win every time.

And even before we’re born, we’re taking on ideas about the world and our place in it. Ideas to do with – we’re loved, wanted, (or not), the world is a welcoming, safe place, or not, etc. Then we’re born. And that can be a trauma in itself, which may teach us ‘I’m not safe!’ or whatever.

Until around we are around the age of 7 years old, we’re pretty much like a sponge. We take on other people’s ideas – ideas such as ‘You’re a nuisance. You’re unlovable. You’re stupid. You don’t matter. You’re trouble.’ Etc. These ideas go deep into our unconscious mind, and form the foundation for our life.

For example, if you take on the idea ‘I deserve to be treated badly, because I am not really worthwhile.’ Well, guess what? You’re set up to be the one who gets picked on, bullied, goes into abusive relationships etc. Change this underlying core program / belief to ‘I deserve to be treated with care and respect’, and your life changes.

That is interesting!

Also, if the unconscious doesn’t want you to do something, it wins. That’s what self-sabotage is about. Eg. if the unconscious has the program, ‘It’s not safe to be successful. It’s not safe to stand out,’ and you want to be successful, well guess what? It’s going to be very difficult to become successful.

Latest Newsletter

Why procrastination?

Procrastination frustrates so many people when they know they can achieve more or just get those jobs done but something always holds them back. It may be those  routine or even improvement chores around the house; it may be a work issue or perhaps helping your kids overcome their procrastination without making the problem worse with endless nagging.

It’s really a confidence thing caused by lifetime programming by parents, teachers, coaches and other kids giving you doubts about your abilit...

View the full newsletter here...

What is your why

It is a really great exercise to stop and ask yourself why. What is your motivation in the various areas of your life and what do you really care about? Your purpose is what keeps your passion and joy alive.

Sometimes life gets too much, the world seems to be falling apart around us, and we are not sure what to hold onto anymore. It might be your relationships, your physical environment, your finances, your work. At other times, you may not be clear what has happened but you feel exposed and vulnerable.

Whe...

View the full newsletter here...

Holding on is what hurts

How heavy is a glass of water?

The weight of the glass doesn't change, but the longer you hold it, the heavier it feels.

Stress, trauma, anxieties and worries in life are like that glass of water.

In fact the weight does not matter… holding on is what hurts. If you hold it for a minute, it's not a problem. If you hold it for an hour, your arm will ache. After a day a day, your arm will feel numb and paralysed.

The weight of the glass doesn't change, but the longer you hold it, th...

View the full newsletter here...